Caught in a trap
The only reasons I can see for anyone wanting to limit another person’s education are fear, mistrust, and control. So, when all these legislators are working so hard to limit what teachers can teach, it makes me wonder what they are so afraid of.
Yesterday I was about to go off on a long tangent about this while I was writing about Pride and the Tulsa Massacre. Thankfully, I realized it should wait for a different article. So, here we are today. I hope tomorrow I will find myself writing something more light-hearted. Part of this whole Year 49 project is writing whatever is on my mind at the moment. So, no telling what in the world is going to come out! Anyone who knows me, knows this could get interesting because I tend to say whatever comes to my mind. (Much to the chagrin of the hubby.)
As I reflect on the holes of my own education and feel shame as well as anger about that, I long for my own kids to learn everything they can about everything they can. I trust myself to teach them well in the midst of the education they get elsewhere. I trust them to be discerning people who think critically. And, I have to add that I also trust God to be big enough to withstand any “false teaching” they may come across in life.
Just today, I saw this quote on Facebook, “If you send your children to be educated by Caesar don’t be surprised when they come home as Romans.” (My Facebook friend seems to have slightly misquoted, but I’m quoting as I saw it.) And, with no other context, in the right conditions, you may even find me on a day that I will agree. Today is not that day.
Is this really what we are so afraid of? Are we really so afraid that our own children will lose sight of every bit of faith and values that we have taught them that we can’t trust them to get a well-rounded education? It is true that my kids do not currently claim the same faith in the same way that I do. Some days this really upsets me, but most days I remember that they are learning and growing to be the people God created them to be. I continue to share my faith with them on a daily basis and I trust God for the rest.
This lack of trust tied up with a lack of education is baffling to me. It brought back a memory of when I served as a chaplain at a seminary . . .
I was sitting in my closet that I had begged the president of the seminary to allow me to turn into an office because at the time, my “office” was the corner table in a copy room. The office I created for myself turned out to be perfect for me. And, I was sitting at my light wood writing table of a desk when a current student came in and asked to speak to me.
Oh my goodness, y’all! This is like a chaplain’s dream. I mean I sat there daily hoping students would come by just to seek a listening ear! “Of course! Come in. Sit down. Would you like a piece of candy?”
The student proceeded to tell me that they were struggling with the teaching in their classes. Their professors were expecting them to think so far outside of anything they had ever thought before. Things like “Should we only use a male pronoun when speaking about God?” They were considering withdrawing and finding a seminary that would simply teach THE BIBLE. (P.S. That isn’t a seminary.)
They were so sincere. And, I was sincere. I listened. I encouraged. I shared my own beliefs. This person kept saying, “I’m just a sinner, you know. I need a strong foundation. Maybe if I learn the Bible first, then I could branch out into these things, but I NEED a strong biblical foundation first.”
Let me jump to the end and ruin the story. I trusted this person to be genuinely seeking my guidance as a chaplain. I found myself saying things like, “The Bible is the Living Word of God and I believe that 100%. I love the Bible. I read the Bible daily. It is the Word of God.” Then, I added something like, “But that doesn’t mean that it is inerrant. Did God create the whole world in six 24-hour days as we know them? Maybe. Maybe not. That is God’s business. Not mine. I’m much more interested in what the story says about God and God’s relationship with humans.” (This was some years ago. I know how trivial this may seem in today’s climate.)
They nodded. They asked questions. They finished things up and before they could leave I asked if I could have a prayer with them. I did. I prayed really good! I asked God to guide them, to help them discern where God wanted them to be. I thanked God for the Bible, the Living Word of God. I thanked God for education and the way God uses our minds to enable us to know God better. I said, “Amen.” We hugged. They left. I patted myself on the back. “Wow! What a good chaplain I am,” I thought. I really listened. I was very honest. And, I remembered to have a prayer too! This one goes in the W column.
A few days later, a friend of mine who happened to be serving on the board of the seminary at the time called me. He had been in a meeting with a group of people which did not include this person with whom I had counseled. The topic arose, “Well, I hear the chaplain at the seminary doesn’t even believe the Bible.”
I was devastated. Truly. It isn’t the most devastating thing that has happened to me in my ministry — we’ve got a whole year for those stories! I had really believed this person had come to me because they needed a chaplain and wanted someone with whom they could talk this through. What I found out is that it was basically a trap. They had already decided that they were withdrawing from that institution and going to one that fit more closely with their own beliefs. Before they left, though, they took advantage of my heart, my good nature, and my naiveté so that they could report to others what they perceived as my lack of respect for the Bible. I don’t know what they hoped to gain by this report. I assume they hoped I would be fired. I was. But, not for that — another story.
I am angry about this, of course. I was angry then. I am still angry and I think I have every right to be. It was devious and dishonest. But, what still bothers me the most is how little trust this person (and the people who were “mentoring” them) had. And, I don’t mean a lack of trust in me. I mean a lack of trust in themselves. During our session together, I remember I even laughed at one point and said, “You should trust yourself more than that. You can handle hearing different viewpoints without it sending you down a path God does not want you to go.” And, what about God? What a total lack of trust for God to be able to speak through everyone when it is clear in that idol of a book that God does speak through everyone.
This may have gone off the rails a bit. I don’t know. My question is “What are we so afraid of?” And, it seems to be mostly fear (which manifests itself as need to control and mistrust) that keeps folks not only blocking others from learning all they can learn about all they can learn, but stops themselves from learning too.
Maybe I am more special than I realize. And, as special as I secretly hope. I don’t know. Maybe I was able to do something that not everyone can. I was able to read the entire Harry Potter series without becoming a witch once. I have read parts of the Book of Mormon and never thought about converting to Mormonism. Heck, I read the Hebrew scriptures often and never have I ever sought a rabbi to help me become Jewish.
I do seek a rabbi, though. His name is Jesus. And, he was a teacher who trusted people to be able to handle the education that not only he offered, but that he saw them learning elsewhere too. I’m sure I’m wrong. I just think he would be okay with the fact that my kids learn about systemic racism and attend public school. Now, that Common Core Math. That is another story.
